A Sense of Vellichor

Perhaps, I am not the girl you write books or songs about. I’m far from perfect. I’m not the girl that gets the happily ever after, nor am I the one you spend the rest of your life with. I’m the girl used for character development, the one who builds you up and tears down your walls, time after time. I am in no way a fairytale, as I’m not easy to deal with. I will put you through hell and watch whether you choose to dowse yourself in water, or let the flames consume you whole. Fairytales end in smooth sails and sunsets, my stories end in rocky shores and thunderstorms—not knowing whether the storm would swallow or spare your soul—I’m not your ideal girl. And I am okay with that, as it means I will never be forgotten. I will shape you and fill your life with experiences until you find your endgame, and that alone is enough for me. My memory will linger at the back of your head like a ghost, haunting you wherever you go, reminding you of a time filled with frustration and bittersweet laughter. I am not the girl you write about, for I’ve taken the role of the ghost that haunts your heart.

^{September 16, 2022 at 3:41AM.}